Dec 31, 2004

New Year

Tragic Closing

I am sitting here with a copy of Utusan Malaysia, it's front page a picture of mangled bodies in Banda Acheh. The TV is fixed on CNBC, constant updates on the disaster. I thought I've heard enough of the repeated gruesome facts. But every hour seem to bring in more tragic information about this town, or that family, or some other individual barely escaping death. When will it all end? Or is this merely the beginning? A prelude to the full wrath of Allah?

I was going to pen down my thoughts on the past year and, traditionally, me resolutions for 2005 that's coming in precisely two hours from now. But all I can think of is the horrid end of 2004.

The year comes to a close with a bang, indeed. Everything that's happened, to me, clearly points to something that God wants us to see. What that is, is beyond my comprehension. At the very least, it's probably to get us back on the right track.

Could it be one of the tanda-tanda hari Qiamat?
Could it be one of the tanda-tanda akhir hari Qiamat?
If so, how much closer are we to it?

By right, I should be getting ready for my trip abroad, but I can't help thinking that it's all superficial. What good is a carefully packed luggage compared to an eternity in hell? I might not even make it to Australia. The end of the world might just come before then. I'm going down to Kota Bharu to see my grandma in a few days. Right now, that's the only thing I desperately want to do.

It seems fickle to be going about life as usual when such a disaster is still looming at our doorstep. But, as, my dad said at dinner, "Kalau dah ajal, no form of forward warning can save you. Kalau dah ajal, tak boleh elak." So true, dad. And so, it is with that in mind I resolve for the new year to:

Insya'Allah...
I will live life correctly, according to what the Quran dictates, so help me God.

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